Twenty years! Hahahahahaha! The labour! The painstaking effort! And the result?

Polished turd.

Bad Sex parties were always the best. I miss 'em. Blinkie accidentally elbowed Germain Greer in the tit one year, and I got eyed up by Claus von Bulow. Happy times.
 

Hey, careful how you phrase that! :)

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On turd-polishing, here's a story by Jerry Lewis about Stanley Kubrick, when Lewis was trying to edit a film he considered a piece of crap:

"That was the night I coined the expression, 'You cannot polish a turd.'

"And then Kubrick looked at me and said, 'You can if you freeze it.'"